We’re about halfway through the Fantasy Football season(optimistically assuming your team survives well into the playoffs) and it’s time to take stock of where you stand. Don’t worry, I promise it will all be okay in the end.
Looking at your standings, depending on the prep you did and the hand you’ve been dealt, you could possibly be:
- 6-2 - You're feeling annoyingly confident with the mid-to-late round long-shots who are giving you RB1 numbers each week,
- 4-4 - You're in the muddled middle, with half your team on a Week 9 bye that threatens to ruin your entire weekend. “No, [significant other’s name], it’s not just a game! Not this week. Not against [dude from work’s name]!”
- 1-7 - You could be as I was three seasons ago, 1-7 and about to make the most improbable, historic run to the playoffs ever (thus forging my long-held belief that one Gronk really can make all the difference). Just kidding about you making the playoffs, though. You definitely won’t.
The Reality of Fantasy Football
Beyond that, whatever your record, maybe there’s no consoling you because your losses came while you still rostered the second-highest scoring squad in your league. You know that pain—you could only lose to one other team…and that’s exactly. What. You. Did. I know; it’s not fair.
But then, (again if you’re like me), you’d do well to recall the needlework on the wall of your childhood home that gently reminds us all that: “Life Isn’t Fair.” But you know what? This is fantasy, so let’s take “fair” and shove it. Your season might be a lost cause, but the fun is just about to begin.
No matter where you stand, all winners and losers agree on the one thing Fantasy Football gives us each season—the thrill of the trash talk. And since you’re here on this site, and therefore familiar with brutal honesty, I’m telling you that your trash talk needs to step up its game.
In fact, that’s exactly what I thought all trash talk needed. So I made an app for that. It’s called ScareCenter and it’s designed with the most mischievous of you in mind.
Welcome to ScareCenter
ScareCenter is an app (available for your Apple and Android handheld devices) that enables you to create fake sports news headlines. It generates a screen shot as though you just received this piece of news on your phone.
You see, it looks like you got a push notification from this other app, by this big sports network…you know, a legitimate source. Anyway, you create the news, fire up the screen shot and, with dopamine coursing through your easily-amused brain, you send this gratifying image to one of the other unsuspecting losers in your league. Better yet, send it to one of the annoying winners.
What Your Competitor Sees
Upon receiving the news that “Tom Brady was arrested on three felony accounts of espionage” or that “Devonta Freeman is listed as Doubtful following a tricycle mishap” the recipient of such news will behave somewhat predictably by:
- Responding to your text with a “WTF!”, “OMG!” or “NOOOOOOOOOOO!”
- Frantically searching all news sites for the same headline.
- Upon not finding said news, asking you “R U sure?”
- Upon discovering that they’ve been played for a damned fool, calling you a wild combination of 4 to 7-letter words that might very well be the most creative thing they’ve ever invented.
You, meanwhile, get to laugh. And you should--you’ve earned it. This is one small victory(moral, immoral, whatever) that no one will be able to take away from you. You might be last in your league, but that doesn’t mean you don’t deserve the last laugh.
Win a Free Copy of ScareCenter!
You know how most things in life aren't truly free? This isn't one of those times.
All you need to do is tweet out this article and tag @LetsTalkFF or retweet our original tweet about the article. If you're one of the first 10 people to do so, we'll give you a code for a free download!
Details: It's iPhone only. Sadly Google Play won't allow Jason to give away codes for free downloads. Sorry folks. You can find the Android version here.
*This is a guest post from Jason Lautenschleger, from ScareCenter. The author’s views are entirely his or her own and may not always reflect the views of Let’s Talk Fantasy Football.
For the record, I never actually played football. I have no doubt that I would get crushed running across the middle for a pass, every single time.
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